My Big Fat Lip
I have herpes. Not genital herpes, not space herpes, but the cold-sore on the mouth sort of herpes. I have a big fat swollen lip. I look bad and feel worse. And to make it all worthwhile, I have to endure other people’s comments on my condition.
The first sort of comment is a misguided attempt to be informative. Know-it-all says, “What’s wrong with your lip?” I say, “Cold sore.” KIA says, “Did you know that you have HERPES!” I say, “Yes I did, and thanks for announcing my plague to the world and making me extremely uncomfortable.”
The second type of comment is the immature variety. When informed that my swollen lip is the result of a cold sore, the Immature Person’s face takes on a knowing look and he slyly asks, “Who have YOU been kissing?”
So, if you are reading this. . . YES, I know cold sores are caused by the herpes virus. It is incurable and I am forever cursed. Drugs only lessen the outbreak and the only sure prevention is to avoid stress, sickness, and sun. NO, I did not get it from kissing anyone! My outbreaks began when I was in grade school. At that point, the only kissing I had done was one boy in kindergarten and I don’t think he gave it to me. And finally, YES, I know this whole post is quite indelicate.
Now leave me alone before I drink out of your coffee cup when you aren’t looking.